Bathroom Door Confessional
by BrittJK
Summary: Killian gets a little too drunk at Ruby's annual Halloween party and ends up confessing his love for Emma through a bathroom door to his friend Tink... or at least he thinks its Tink behind that door. See inside for full tumblr prompt.


Based off the tumblr prompt: Costume party where they're both bringing other dates. He's not romantically interested in his date - she's just a friend. But he's been pining after Emma, who's been in a relationship for awhile. His date is dressed as Tinkerbell. The night wears on and Emma hasn't shown yet. He sees the huge Tinkerbell wings outside of the tiny bathroom so assumes his date is in there. Proceeds to give drunken monologue to her through the door about Emma not showing and how he's gonna die if she doesn't break up with her boyfriend soon he loves her so much. The bathroom door opens and its a red-eyed Emma, having been comforted by Killian's date, because she came to the party straight after breaking up with her boyfriend.

* * *

 **Bathroom Door Confessional**

Killian groans, trying to stuff his leg into the tight leather pants that are customary for his Halloween costume. He doesn't want to go to this party – barely even wants to think about this party – but Emma is going to be there and thus he has to go. Has to make an appearance, even if only for a moment.

It's _their_ party. Well, technically it's Ruby's party, but it's where Killian first met Emma and thus he likes to think of it as their party. Finally pulling the leather up his second leg, Killian thinks back on that first Halloween. He had just moved to Storybrooke from London, travelling for more reasons than one. The primary being his transfer from work, the even more primary being how staying in London without his brother was almost unbearable. Ruby was the girl from the local diner, a diner Killian frequented on early mornings and late nights, and they had become friendly – friendly enough for Ruby to invite Killian to her house only three weeks after meeting for a Halloween gathering.

Killian almost didn't go, but something in him wanted friendship and companionship after three weeks of work and solitude in his small apartment. Killian lets out a laugh at how stupid he was – showing up without a costume, not expecting adults to dress up. Little did he know – the entire apartment was filled with different people in extravagant disguises – princesses, super heroes, one guy was even dressed as Frankenstein (the Doctor, not the monster). Killian felt wholly out of place, and was about to leave when someone tapped him on the shoulder.

"Okay, that has got to be the worst Han Solo costume I've ever seen."

Killian had turned around, staring straight into the eyes of one Emma Swan dressed as a perfect Princess Leia. He then had looked down at himself, noticing the white-shirt black-vest combo (though much more dressed up than anything Han Solo would actually wear), and felt himself laughing, really truly laughing, for the first time since Liam passed. And from then, it was history.

He and Emma were inseparable, wearing matching costumes the next two years (one where Killian _actually_ dressed as Han Solo, the next they went as Captain Mal and Inara from Firefly). The only true issue with their friendship, was that any time Killian tried to buck up the courage to tell Emma his true feelings for her, she was always attached to someone.

They didn't start dating after that first Halloween because Emma was dating Neal. Once they broke up, and after a good two-month cooling off period, Killian finally build up the nerve to ask Emma out only to find her panicking about a date with a guy named Graham from work. The next time Emma was single, Killian had given up for a while and was dating the local librarian Belle. But by the time he and Belle split amicably, Emma had already moved on to a man named Walsh.

Killian groaned, falling back on his bed as he finally manages to zip up the leather. He is dressing as Captain Hook, going to the party with some friends from work. They are a whole Neverland crew, with a Smee, a few lost boys, and even someone dressing as the crocodile. Killian was going to arrive with the receptionist who was going as Tinkerbell, opting not to arrive alone if Emma was coming with Walsh. He heard they may be coming as Elizabeth Swann and Will Turner, making Killian all the more willing to flesh out his pirate costume to the extreme. Hence, leather pants that make it impossible to breathe, and a fresh coating of black eyeliner to top it all off.

Finally ready, Killian pulls on his coat and waits for Tink to arrive. Even though they are just going as friends, there isn't really any reason why they should arrive separately. And, if it helps make Emma jealous, so be it.

The party is in full swing when they arrive, even though they are only twenty minutes late. Killian instantly scans the room for a female pirate, knowing Emma would've opted for the tougher Elizabeth Swann from the later movies, than the demure one in a dress from The Black Pearl. Not seeing her in the sea of faces, Killian lets out a small sigh and looks down towards his companion.

"Let's get us a drink, shall we?"

Emma's absence is odd, as she normally helps Ruby set up the decorations. Killian continues to scan the room for her as they walk to the kitchen to grab drinks, his hook resting on the small of Tink's back to try to keep her from bumping into other guests with her large wings. They manage to steer their way into the kitchen, grab drinks, and come back out again fairly quickly, but without running into Emma. Killian looks at his watch, and it is only quarter-to-ten, thus lots of time for Emma to show up. Perhaps she is just late – or helping Ruby with something. He doesn't want to think of Emma being off with Walsh somewhere, maybe in Ruby's bedroom, fooling around. Instead, Killian stomps that idea out of his mind and attempts to pay attention to the conversations around him.

The party is fun – Ruby's usually are - and Killian finds himself relaxing the more alcohol he ingests. Normally Killian tries to shy away from the stuff – he had spiraled in England after Liam's death – but tonight Tink had offered to drive and make sure he doesn't drink too much, so he feels safe.

However, the alcohol does allow his mind to run rampant, and as the clock nears to midnight and Killian still hasn't found Emma, he finds himself needing to brood. And needing to vent. Looking towards the bathroom, Killian notices a pair of large green wings lingering outside, then finally the door opening and the wings disappearing.

There are definitely no other Tinkerbells at this party – and Killian has ranted to Tink before about his infatuation with Emma – thus rattling his insecurities and love for his best friend through a bathroom door to his receptionist seems as good an idea as any.

Killian fills up his glass one last time, getting some of the good rum this time, before meandering over towards the bathroom, nodding at a few people as he goes. He finds the door and plops himself down outside it, leaning back and banging his head on the door for good measure.

"Occupied!" calls Tink's frantic voice, and Killian sighs as he bangs his head again.

"What am I doing with my life?" Killian says, turning his head so Tink can hear him better. "When will I ever buck up the courage to tell Emma how I feel?"

Tink doesn't reply, and Killian takes the silence as an invitation to bear his soul.

"I should've bloody asked her out two years ago, after she and Neal had split. I should've bucked up the courage to tell her not to go on that date with Graham, to go out with me instead. I should've broken up with Belle the first moment I heard Emma was free again, should've grabbed her and kissed her like my life depends on it. Because my life does depend on it. Because Emma is my life, and I don't know how I could go on without her –

"And bloody Walsh. That ponce thinks he is good enough for Emma, when all he does is flash around his money and furniture store and stupid pet monkey. I mean, who even has a pet monkey?

"Tink, I don't think I can survive without her. When I'm not near her, I feel like I can't breathe. My whole world lights up when she is in the room. When I hear her laugh, I don't feel as broken inside. When she smiles at me, I feel like I've finally made something of myself. The man I am with Emma – it's the man I think my brother wanted me to be. I'm my full potential – I'm who I'm meant to be. And she brings that out in me. And I'm just…

"I'm just a bloody idiot for not telling her sooner, and for keeping this on for so long. But I can't possibly stop being her friend, because losing her entirely is so much worse than just being her friend. But god, if only she would show a sign that she wants more – show a sign that I am a man she could love. Then I'd run to her. Or even, if she'd let me know I don't have a bloody chance in hell with her in more than friendship, then at least I'd know. And I could stop pining so hard. But I just…

"I love her. I love her so much – more than I think I've ever loved anyone or anything ever. And, Tink, I think I'll _die_ if she doesn't break up with Walsh bloody now."

Killian pauses, taking a deep swig of his rum.

"Are you even listening, Tink? You always have advice; you always know what to say when I can't get her off my mind. Can you just say something?"

Killian waits, hoping for an answer. But instead of an answer, he feels himself falling as the door opens. He collapses to the floor, closing his eyes as his head bangs against the tile. It doesn't hurt much, the alcohol dampening the blow, but what does hurt is the image he sees when he opens his eyes.

"Emma?" Killian asks, staring up into Emma's tear-stained face. She looks down at him, her mouth wide open and eyes red. Killian doesn't know what to say, doesn't know what to do – just stares as she steps over him and out of the bathroom, disappearing into the throngs of the party.

"I could've bloody sworn…" Killian mutters, sitting up and rubbing his head. But then he freezes, realizing everything he just said with _Emma_ being the one behind the door. He continues to sit and stare until something, nay, someone kicks his arm.

"GO AND GET HER!" Tink cries, still standing in the small bathroom and glaring angrily at Killian.

"What?" Killian asks, looking over at Tink and back to where Emma ran away. So he was right – he just was wrong about her being alone in the bathroom.

Tink sighs, stepping over Killian, then bending down so she can stare him in the eye. "Walsh broke up with her. That's why she was late, and that's why I was in the bathroom with her. I was trying to comfort her, but then _you_ came." She shakes her head, then smacks Killian on the side of his.

"You both are idiots. And she definitely stopped crying after your whole declaration of love, or whatever that drunken speech was. So, as I said. Go. Get. Her!" Each of Tink's last words were punctuated with another smack to Killian's head.

"Yes, my lady," Killian replies with glee, attempting to jump up from the ground. Turns out getting up in leather pants, and while pretty drunk, is not a good combination. The fabric is tight in all the wrong places, and Killian almost falls over himself more than once attempting to right himself. And then there is a snag, and a horrible ripping sound, and Killian is standing upright but the inseam on his pants could've seen better days.

Tink rolls her eyes, letting out a small laugh at Killian's sail-boat boxers. "Well, at least that's kind of on the pirate theme still."

"Should I…?" Killian asks, pointing to the bathroom then back at his pants.

"Oh, she won't mind. GO!" Tink pushes Killian forward, throwing him back into the party and a gaggle of people who don't even notice him moving through them with ripped pants.

He finds Emma sitting on a couch in the corner, curled up into a ball and a half-empty cup of something in her hands. He steps over slowly, cautiously. Doesn't want to wake the Swan, so to speak. When he gets close enough for him to know she has noticed him, he panics. The fear of rejection taking over, the insecure boy from his youth too scared to even talk to girls coming out. The fear that even though Emma is all he wants, he isn't want she wants.

"Is it true?" Emma asks, breaking what felt like silence even though the room is filled with people talking and music blaring.

"Is what true, love?" Killian asks, the term of endearment falling out without notice. He hears Emma's breath hitch, hears how she notices his nickname.

"What you said to Tink, at the bathroom," Emma mutters, and Killian has to strain to hear her through the sounds of the party. "That you love me."

Killian sighs. "Aye, love. Every word."

"Okay," Emma says, a small smile gracing her face. She pats the seat next to her on the couch, and Killian slowly moves to sit beside her. He moves carefully, watching Emma as he goes for any sudden movements. As soon as his bottom finds the cushion, though, Killian hears another ripping noise.

Both of their eyes fall down to Killian's pants, the tear moving so that the entire right leg, from crotch to knee, is open along the seam. Silence fills the noise between them, then, just as naturally, they both break out into laughter.

Emma curls herself over, and Killian really gets a good look at her as she wraps herself around him. She is in a plain pair of brown pants, white peasant top, with a brown vest. Killian can tell the costume was thrown together, probably when Walsh derailed their night. Another part of him doesn't care, because Emma Swan is cuddling with him on the couch.

"I do too, you know," Emma says, though Killian isn't quite sure if he heard her right. Did she just…

"Emma?" Killian asks, turning his head to angle down just as she angles her upwards.

"We're both idiots," she replies before pressing her lips to his. Killian doesn't know what to do – where to put his arms, how much pressure to put in. So he just lets Emma lead. Smiles into the kiss when she giggles and pulls his arms around her, opens his mouth to her when she opens hers to him. They pull back, and though Emma's eyes still have red rims on them, her shining smile exclaims her true feelings.

"You know, that has got to be the worst Elizabeth Swann costume I've ever seen." Killian says with a smile, giving Emma little nudge.

"Oh, shut up," Emma replies. She ends up shutting him up herself, using her mouth to quiet his.

The next year at Ruby's party they show up together, Elizabeth Swann and Will Turner, completely and utterly in love.

* * *

Happy Halloween!

Let me know what you think and come hang out on tumblr with me! :D


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